Florida! Day 2

4/3/09 7:36 pm
I got up this morning around 10 (while Nick was in Science) and went out to swim around for about six hours, with breaks only to pee, text, or eat, and then we went out for dinner. Dressed in my sexier clothes of a tank top and a miniskirt, I looked hawt. Exept for the sunburn coating my body! Only the "bikini areas" were still pale. I even burned my hands and feet!
We came back to Grandpa's and I annonced I was going to further explore the community. I found a pool, tennis court, coconut trees like the ones in his backyard (COCONUT trees. In his backyard! How cool is that?!) and a lake. Me and Josh grabbed some shells and I found a full oyster shell, but a spider crawled out and I freaked. Well, that's it for now.
8:01
I love guys who are sweet. They rock <3. This time I DON'T mean just Nick.
8:51
So. Much. Pain. I'm gonna sleep now, if nothing to escape the pain. Normally that's my exit from emotional, not physical, pain. That's saying quite a lot.
-- Post From My iPhone

Florida!- Day 1

4/2/09
Well, right now all I'm doing is sitting on the sofa, waiting for Grace and Josh, aka Beevus and Butthead, get home. Trust me- half an hour takes FOREVER. So do half days, when all you can think of is warm sun, clear water and white sand. Each half hour seemed to crawl by with the sole purpose of annoying me. Dulles seems to be a second home to me now, no matter how sad that is. I've seen every gate, every place to go, I can tell you the best airlines, and which ones have the best food. (British Airlines, fo shizzle) so yeah. God, 11:48? You have got to be kidding me. Well, whatever. I'm going to Fort Myers with my grandpa, but Nicks going up to Seattle. The only way we could be farther apart was if he was in Alaska and I was in like Purto Rico. He's going to the state of rain while I'm at the Sunshine State. Notice how that's the opposite of our personalities? I think I am going to change my name. I'm thinking Rain or Raquel. I like them both- the rain's soft pitter-patter on the windowpaines, and the Hispanic sound to Raquel. My mom is hispanic- so I speak okay Spanish. For example:
Mi abulita a mi madre se habla espaniol.
Te amor Nick.
Musica es mi loco amo.
See? I also have a few helpful hits for one with brothers:
Kiente- shut up.
Kiente KIENTE KIENTE!!!!!!!!- Shut the HELL up you annoying... Yeah.
Okay I'm leaving now. I'll be back... With sunburn.
1:28 pm
Riding the bus to the termanal. Boring!
2:27 pm
1989 by Mindless Self Indulgence- my hero! I am so bored it's beyond sad. B70 has about twelve people at the entire gate. Apparently Dulles to Fort Meyers isn't a popular flight.
We'll be out of dreary Virginia in an hour. For now, I'm searching for a Dunkin Doughnuts or a Borders with books I wouldn't barf after reading. I've only been home three hours and I already read three books! Can you say nerd? Nah, I'm way cool B). Oooh, a Borders!
3:34
Plane is beginning to take off! About freakin time!
5:31
We've been at "cruising altitude" for a while now, and I am SO bored. The good news is that we're in Florida now, well over it anyway. I can't wait for you to shut me up....
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!!
(couldn't resist)
Anyway, I'm gonna finish my book. That would be like the third book today? That's me alright.
5:49
One word: Yawn!
This is why I hate travel, though it's a lot shorter than Paris. Oh, Paris is AMAZING, btw.
6:29
Here we are!
6:55
Weather: perfect.
Clouds: none
Sky: blue.
Convertable: top down
Hair: Golden in the sunlight and whipping around my face.
Cramps: sadly, many.
Everything is perfect in Florida! Well, what did you expect ;)?
Oh, and riding with the top down isn't always sexy. When you're screaming "Goodbye Borington!!!!!!!!!" Like I was, guys throw you some freaked up glances.
9:31
Sitting in the hot tub, in a sexy black bikini with perfumed bubbles rising around me... Nirvana...
-- Post From My iPhone

Song

Eyes of blue
Staring straight through me
Oh hair of blonde
Gleaming endlessly
The one I love
The one I love
Blue like the sky
On warm summer days
Blue like my
Isolation
Rain from the sky.
Blond
The fields if wheat
The color of the sun
And this song dosn't say
How much I love you :)
Rachael+Nick <3
And I'd die just to hold you
Stay with you
So many nights
I've cried myself to sleep
Now that you love me
I love myself
I never thought I would say that
I never thought there'd be
You

-- Post From My iPhone

Hands are cold as ice.

She looks in the mirror, her eyes red and puffy from crying, tear tracks drying over her pale skin. She is beautiful, her blonde hair wavy and golden, but they do little more than disguise her tears. Her nose his aquiline and flawless save for a small zit at the top. Her lips are red but chapped and bleeding, and her jaw is strong. She has to be, for her sister, for her troubled brother. She whispers words no one will ever hear, says things she knows no one will beleive. She has to believe her lies. That's all she has become- a pretty face bent by lies and illusions. And fear. So much fear. She sinks to her knees, blood spattered on the hardwood floor. Deeper and deeper. The cuts scraped farther and farther. She knew it would hurt her. She knows it could kill her.
Yet she does it still.
Why? She'll never tell.
Because she is me.


-- Post From My iPhone

I never said I didn't love you!

I am seriously changing. I used to be, I'll never be Mrs. (guys first and last name) because I am Rachael, and I sure as hell will be until the day I die. Then I fell madly in love. Now I enjoy every moment we spend together, not worrying about the future or anyone else. It's just us. It seems that way to me even as I drift off into my own little world, but I don't care because fantasy is so much better than reality! He'll take my hand and we stroll beneath the stars, and I don't need anything, I have my whole heart next to me. Part of me will always be with him, not physically of course, but emotionally. I wonder about college- who dosn't?!?- but my dream is Julliard or NYU, and he's more science.
We'll see. College is years away. Hopefully we'll call or text a lot. I can't survive a summer without him texting me, let alone four years!
I'm getting needlessly stressed out.
They say that when you meet "the One" everything changes. And I have changed ALOT since that first day of fifth grade when I first saw those beautiful blue eyes I see in my head every night. I beleive that if something is meant to be, it'll happen, but you have to help, not just stand idly by. Cinderella may have gotten help from her fairy godmother, but she herself went to the ball. Now I may not be Cinderella and he isn't Prince whothehellcares but I love him. I feel like he isn't just a friend who comes and goes- he's someone who will stick by me till the end. And that would really be nice. I need someone to cheer me up or laugh along with me or hold my hand when I'm afraid. And I'll do the same for him.
I have found my reason to live, and I will always love it. I could be dying, but like that Thriving Ivory song Angels on The Moon, I want to feel again. I miss the pain of spraining your wrist. I feel like a ballon, cut from the strings that held me down as I float farther and father away from me.

-- Post From My iPhone