If I can give you nothing else, just let me say this: I love you, I miss you, and I can't believe the one good thing that ever happened to me is over, but I will be with you in spirit forever. It's a mess inside my head, lost thoughts and forgotten memories scattered around the floor, abstract concepts of thought floating around, but you I will always hold near. Because you're not in my head; you're in my heart. You are where I'm home, where I go to when I have nowhere left to turn. Also, I think it's weird that I can't tell you this stuff, yet I can blog about it and it could be read by random people who like dramatic stories about young love. If you ever need someone to hold, someone to tell you it'll be okay, someone sholder to cry on, I'm here for you. Because you were there for me. I don't dream to sleep; I sleep to dream because you are always there. I know that I've got issues, but you're pretty messed up too I guess that I just found out I'm nothing without you cause we belong together now yeah you've got a piece of me and honestly my life (my life) would suck (would suck) without you!
It's true though. I feel good enough to be loved by you. And if you don't love me, you seriously are blind. I'm blonde, I'm tall(ish), I have blue eyes, I'm smart, I can play 6 instruments, and I can write music. I guess we were perfect, and real life poured down on us.
Because nothing is that good in real life. And if it is, I wouldn't be able to get it. I'm miserable.
I can't say no to you. Never have, never will. We may be just kids, but I don't care. I'm not. My birth certificate may say so, but it's not true. I only felt totally happy around you. I don't know why; love is blind! But I do love you. Every day my misery gets worse. I miss you. Where was your heart? You weren't very physical (and I don't mean sex... Perverts.) and love is more than just glances and effortless talking. Yet you treated me like a queen, and I'm not used to that. So much was left unsaid (on my part anway) and I knew there wasn't enough words to say it. I could have expressed it through a kiss easily. At least you'd remember me. Don't forget me. We may grow apart as a couple, but I'll always be your friend. I'll catch you when you fall. A good friend would bail you out of jail, but a best friend would be sitting next to you saying "Damn, we screwed up!" because friends don't let friends do stupid things... Alone. And I already do stupid things, so why not have company?
We may be very different, but we are the same. I want to say the very important thing you left out when you broke up with me: Goodbye. I'll see you soon, I hope.
That's kind of important.
-- Rachael's iTouch
